I’m spending 2 nights with a Big Blonde Hunk of Male Movie Star (let’s call him “Abs McSurfer”). Just him, me, & a couple hundred buttinsky Show Biz Pros who won’t leave us alone. When told of this booking my Boyfriend mumbled ”Hmmmph!”

All-Star Casts are rare and this 75 Million Dollar Heavy-Duty Legal Drama is shooting at the Court House Downtown from 6pm-6am with multiple Award Winning Actors. Where a Star there a Star. Production has taken over the entire building, but they have to remove every piece of equipment before start-of-government-business each morning (then bring it back 12 hours later…oye). I stop counting after hearing the 10th bad Crew impression of ”You Can’t Handle The Truth!” There is lots of tension to speed things up just when I get a tap on my shoulder. It’s a dear college friend’s Hubby…who just happens to be a Famous Star. I get to spend 2 days shooting with someone who is a terrifically talented hilarious guy who everyone loves that I actually know! I introduce my Pal to the Background Casting Director saying “And this is my close personal friend the ‘Big Shot’.”  Let’s hope her laugh means “Hmmm John Starr knows famous people…I should cast him more often.” It could happen.

Wardrobe loves all my ’Courtroom Professor’ outfits…

… I seem to have “Tweedy” down pat!

Night Calls for Background Performers in Major Studio Films are like a Cocktail Party (& I have many friends here). We feast at Midnight on all-you-can-eat King Crab Legs and T-Bone Steak and gossip about the Stars and Director (who me?). My Pal the Hubby Famous Guy lightens the Set Stress after chow by suggesting to the angry Director that a “Spit Take” might be right for his character. Everyone is grateful for his needed laugh. Cinema Secret: They are shooting this huge movie with a Red Digital Camera. No actual Film is in the camera anymore. Bye bye Film. During a scene, my Pal delivers his dialogue and walks past me down a hallway filled with Courtroom Background. “Hi John Starr” he surprisingly says under his breath and makes me crack up on-camera. For the rest of the 2 days his goal is to make me lose my composure whenever Camera Rolls. This proves to be an easy task. I spend the rest of the shoot biting my quivering lips every time “ACTION!” is yelled. Funny Hubby turns this job into a total blast and also does an excellent Jack Benny impression to boot (“Oh Rochester….”). I like having Famous Friends.

Meanwhile I have an interesting habit following Male Stars into Restrooms. Don’t be shocked, lots of Extras do this. It started in 1974 when my Dad graciously suggested I might have fun using his Academy Award tickets (yes he’s a Member and I went 14 years in a row and saw everyone).

1974 at the Oscars!  Look at my former curly locks and wave farewell

At 19 I found myself taking a piss next to Paul Newman (and how often does that happen?). It was a complete coincidence that my date & I got out of my Mom’s Ford Falcon Station Wagon the same time Paul and Joanne Woodward got out of their Limo. Yes we may have followed them down the Red Carpet “a little closely”. Yes I was in ‘Women’s Wear Daily’ Newspaper the next day in a photo of Paul & Joanne laughing at a sign in the stands that said “Nixon for Best Sound Editing” (that’s 10% of my face cropped on the right side of the photo).

And yes your Honor I admit I may have followed Paul Newman into the Dorothy Chandler Pavilion’s downstairs Men’s Room…by accident. Okay not really. Butch Cassidy and the Devil made me do it. Did too.

So when I did the same thing at 2:20am downtown with Abs McSurfer, I was on auto-pilot I swear to Goddess. At least I had the decency (and fear) to go into a stall instead of stand next to Abs while he hummed and pissed (he hums while he pisses? Is that something people do?). Get ready for the 64,000 Dollar Question. Did he wash his hands?  All I can tell you is … my days of following Stars are over. I swear. You shut up.