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Back to School Musings

1) What’s the most important thing for a student to bring with them on their first day of school?

After hearing MANY young people tell me they’re bi-polar. (It must be the “in” thing now-a-days) I’d have to say they’d better bring all of their personalities to school, so they’re all equally educated. After all, we need to stay in compliance with the “No Child Left Behind Act”, right?

2) What’s the one new back to school thing that teachers should have?

Body armor. Just in case the bi-polar students bring all of their personalities and one of them decide to have a bad day.

3) How does a student know if they’ve got a good or bad teacher?

The good teacher is the one who doesn’t have students stuffed into duffel bags and shoved into a closet. The bad teacher is the one who stuffed students into duffel bags, but forgot to gag them first.

4) What’s the longest part of the day?

The part where you decide you gotta use the restroom and find every stall is occupied.

5) What’s the best thing to do if you’re called to the principal’s office?

Hide the evidence and keep your scarier personality locked away.

6) What does “back to school” mean to an adult?

Vacation!

7) Why should kids stay in school?

When you make a mistake and have a diploma, it’s a learning opportunity. When you make a mistake and are a school drop out, it’s because you failed to learn.

8) What’s the worst thing you ever did in the school cafeteria?

Stuffed the slop they called “food” into my milk carton, so I would be allowed to go outside and play. However, I think it might have saved my life on more than one occasion… ack!

9) What’s the worst thing you ever did in the school bathroom?

No! That wasn’t cigarette smoke coming out from over that stall! I ate in the school cafeteria and it lit my hind end afire!

10) When you day-dreamed in school, where did you go?

Anywhere, except for inside the classroom… That is, until the teacher called out my name… Wha? Huh?… President Kennedy was a famous astronaut, because he was going to the moon, I guess… Ummm… Uhhh… What was the question?

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